“I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. The hired hand is not the shepherd and does not own the sheep. So when he sees the wolf coming, he abandons the sheep and runs away. Then the wolf attacks the flock and scatters it. The man runs away because he is a hired hand and cares nothing for the sheep." -John 10: 11-13 (NIV)
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
The Good Shepherd
My devotional reading today was about being a good shepherd in today's terms. The "Life Question" at the end of the devotional asked, "What have you sacrificed for the sake of another person?" That question stomped down pretty hard on my toes. I stopped to think about it and I've been pretty selfish lately. Not only in dealing with the people around me, but in my time with God. This summer session I will be attending Church of Christ services each Sunday morning for a class project. This past Sunday I used that Sunday morning service as an excuse not to go to my church Sunday night. I have also been skipping out on choir practice to "do homework" which hasn't been getting done, even though I honestly have every intention of working on homework when I say that. I guess what I'm trying to say is that in order to be a good shepherd, you have to learn to be a good sheep. Isn't it wonderful that even when we stray, our shepherd will always come find us?
Monday, June 11, 2012
Facebook/Twitter Addiction
Good morning, friends!
I have been off Facebook and Twitter for 3 days. I, honestly, feel better already. It was a little awkward when I would try to text Twitter or a Facebook status and then remember that I'm not supposed to be posting, but I'm sure that will get easier. It's funny now because I think, "The whole world doesn't have to know that you just cooked an amazing dinner!" So far, I've found myself to be less stressed since I'm not constantly checking to see what's going on. I can just sit and enjoy actual face-to-face, real, live company! Ha!
It helps that we don't have a computer at home and that my phone has a terrible browser (since it's 3 generations behind) so I don't really have a chance to get on Facebook and Twitter. Which is good, because when a person is going through withdraws it's good to have little or no access to the offending obsession/addiction.
Anyway, guess I better get back to my homework. Today began Week 3 of 5, so I better get to it!
I have been off Facebook and Twitter for 3 days. I, honestly, feel better already. It was a little awkward when I would try to text Twitter or a Facebook status and then remember that I'm not supposed to be posting, but I'm sure that will get easier. It's funny now because I think, "The whole world doesn't have to know that you just cooked an amazing dinner!" So far, I've found myself to be less stressed since I'm not constantly checking to see what's going on. I can just sit and enjoy actual face-to-face, real, live company! Ha!
It helps that we don't have a computer at home and that my phone has a terrible browser (since it's 3 generations behind) so I don't really have a chance to get on Facebook and Twitter. Which is good, because when a person is going through withdraws it's good to have little or no access to the offending obsession/addiction.
Anyway, guess I better get back to my homework. Today began Week 3 of 5, so I better get to it!
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Lemon Water
Today is June 7th, 2012. I'm half-way through the year and I'm only 2 lbs away from my BEGINNING weight. Yippee. Ha! Honestly, I'm not as upset about it as you might think. A good friend of mine taught me the "Fake it til you make it" mantra and that's been pretty much my motto for the past day or two. Today especially. Today I've found several things that could make me very angry/upset/annoyed/frustrated/sad...pretty much any negative emotion, but I refuse to let it get me down. Even if it does, I'm going to act like everything is okay, because, you know what? In the end it will be okay. My God is bigger than all this mess going on around me. So when the world gives you lemons and you don't have any money for sugar, just grin and bear it. It's hot enough outside that people will buy your lemon water for $0.25. Just keep the ice coming! (Haha, I'm not sure where that metaphor came from, but I'll go with it.)
The song that keeps playing in my mind is that Veggie Tales song "God is Bigger than the Boogeyman." While that song is mostly about fear, it can be applied to any problem. God is bigger than it all and "He's watching out for you and me!" I may have gotten myself into this mess, but I'm positive that one way or another, God can use it to His advantage.
The song that keeps playing in my mind is that Veggie Tales song "God is Bigger than the Boogeyman." While that song is mostly about fear, it can be applied to any problem. God is bigger than it all and "He's watching out for you and me!" I may have gotten myself into this mess, but I'm positive that one way or another, God can use it to His advantage.
"The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him." -Psalm 28:7 (NIV)
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
WARNING: Blog Under Construction
Sooo...if any of you have checked out my blog since, oh...February, it's pretty much looked like this. Half-way finished. I promise I'm working on getting it fixed, but since my home computer is currently getting fixed after I dropped it (yes, I dropped it), it might take a little longer as I can't see the full page when I'm here at work. Haha, but I am working on it.
Monday, June 4, 2012
Jealousy
I'm pretty sure I've blogged about this before, but these thoughts won't leave me alone lately. I really want a baby. I get jealous every time someone tells me (okay, maybe they just tell all of facebook, but you get my point) they are expecting. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for them and glad they are allowing God to bless them with an addition to their family, but that doesn't mean I'm any less jealous.
And for the record, no, we are not trying to get pregnant anytime soon. I just want a baby. If we thought we could support another addition into our family, we would be trying. We both want kids. But we aren't comfortable adding another life into our household right now. I'm trying to get my master's degree and only working part-time and Clint's job barely gets the bills paid. We aren't hurting or anything, but we would be in a very rough spot if I was to get pregnant anytime soon.
Now, back to my ramblings. Several of my friends are pregnant or have small children. As I said before, I am happy for them. All of them. I just... I don't know how to deal with my feelings of jealousy. I don't like being jealous. I'm tired of being jealous. I don't know how to get over being jealous. I know that my jealousy gets in the way of me showing my happiness for them, but how can I show my happiness when that green monster won't budge?
And for the record, no, we are not trying to get pregnant anytime soon. I just want a baby. If we thought we could support another addition into our family, we would be trying. We both want kids. But we aren't comfortable adding another life into our household right now. I'm trying to get my master's degree and only working part-time and Clint's job barely gets the bills paid. We aren't hurting or anything, but we would be in a very rough spot if I was to get pregnant anytime soon.
Now, back to my ramblings. Several of my friends are pregnant or have small children. As I said before, I am happy for them. All of them. I just... I don't know how to deal with my feelings of jealousy. I don't like being jealous. I'm tired of being jealous. I don't know how to get over being jealous. I know that my jealousy gets in the way of me showing my happiness for them, but how can I show my happiness when that green monster won't budge?
"Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming but who can stand before jealousy?" - Proverbs 27:4 (NIV)
Monday, May 7, 2012
Me Again
My friends have been begging me to blog again. I've just been so busy finishing up the semester. Even today I'm not sure what to blog about. I could be really negative and talk about the many things that I'm doing wrong and how terrible I am. That would be a list that could, quite possibly, go on for days. So, I guess I'll just check in for now. I have not died, nor has anything else catastrophic happened. I'm still me, a poor sinner saved by grace with a 3.33 GPA for my first semester as a graduate student. :)
Also: Check out this new blog. My cousin will be going on a mission trip this summer and has decided to blog about it.
Also: Check out this new blog. My cousin will be going on a mission trip this summer and has decided to blog about it.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
I serve a risen Savior!
I haven't blogged in almost a month. I like blogging, but this month, I feel like I would do is complain, and after reading Proverbs and Pacifiers that is the LAST thing I want to do. She's pretty much been on an anti-complaining kick all month; not that it's a bad thing. So, we'll see what I can come up with today.
"I serve a risen Savior; He's in the world today! I know that He is with me, whatever men may say! I see His hand of mercy; I hear His voice of cheer. And just the time I need Him, He's always near!"
There. I feel better now. :)
1. God always knows exactly what I need, when I need it.
Phillippians 4:19 "But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus."2. God gave me a wonderful husband who helped me do the dishes even when he was sick!
3. God gave me the most wonderful family a girl could ever ask for.
4. God (and my husband) let me have two crazy cats who keep me up at night and wake me up way too early in the morning, but I love them both and wouldn't trade me for the world (even when I threaten to)!
5. God blessed me with a wonderful job here at the school as a graduate assistant (and who else can blog while they're at work?)!
Ok, so I could probably keep going, but I'll stop with 5. I honestly feel much better than I did when I started this. Isn't God good? Guess I better get to my homework. Thanks for reading!
Sunday, January 29, 2012
My Personal Philosophy of Human Nature
Alright, I haven't posted in a while, but with good reason. School and work have kept me busy. I've been talking about my philosophy of human nature...well, the following is pretty much my paper. I added the italicized part just for your benefit. : ) I'm sure I could have done more, but with only one "good" source (since the Bible isn't considered a piece of professional literature)... this is what I could come up with in the time I gave myself, which wasn't much. We'll see what grade it comes back with but here you go. If nothing else, it's a condensed version of what I'm sure I'll have to eventually expand on. Thanks for reading!
The past two weeks, I have not done much writing, but I have been researching , thinking, and planning. Ok..and maybe a little procrastination..but give me a break: this is a hard thing to put down in writing. So, I will start out by saying this: I do not like calling myself a religious person, or even a spiritual person, because there are so many stereotypes behind both of those terms; I do, however, hold tightly to my beliefs and those beliefs, as well as many personal experiences, shape my view of the world and human nature. With that said, I will try to do my best to explain my views and beliefs on human nature.
According to Romans 3:10 of the King James Bible, “. . . there is none righteous, no, not one.” If righteous means good, then that must mean that all humans are bad. This statement is also supported by the Christian belief in the fall of mankind in Genesis chapter 3 and the subsequent beliefs that because of the fall, all humans are born with a sin nature. Even Stenmark (2009) admits that “human nature [is] the range of human traits and behavior patterns that are inborn rather than learned” (p.898) in his idea of a social constructivist’s point of view. Stenmark (2009) also discusses what he calls his “free will thesis, that [. . .] human beings are created by God with a free will” (p. 910). This is the Christian (and my own personal belief) that we, as humans, were created in order to follow and serve God, but that he wanted us to serve him voluntarily. He made the angels without free will to serve him involuntarily, but that’s a discussion for another time. Having free will made the fall of human kind possible, and again, proves that we are all born with a sin nature since we are all descendants of the first two humans. My personal philosophy, rooted deeply in my beliefs, is that everyone is born with a sin nature and a free will. I feel that I have adequately explained my basic beliefs on human nature, so I feel more comfortable moving on, as most of my other responses will stem from this basic belief.
People are motivated by different things; however, I believe that the basic motivation is pleasure or satisfaction. I believe that people do the things they do for pleasure. In some cases, such as drug and/or sex addictions, the pleasure may be more temporary than the pleasure you might get from helping at a food pantry or homeless shelter. Both good and bad deeds can bring a person pleasure, and we experience pleasure then we are more likely to repeat the action. This belief can be proven through behavioral theories as tested by B. F. Skinner with his birds. The birds were getting pleasure from their reward of food and so repeated the process.
Personal problems can be caused by any number of things. I believe, however, that stress is a large factor in personal problems. Yes, problems can be tests from God, or they can just be the messes that our sinful human nature has gotten us into, which would also explain some of the large amounts of stress that we are under. I also believe that stress is large reason for problems being maintained and even worsened. When we stress and worry over something, we sometimes tend to make the problem larger than it was to begin with. One simple example is when you stress over a test or homework assignment so much that you may put off studying, but then you realize that if you don’t at least look over the notes a couple hours, that you really will fail.
These problems can be fixed easily with stress or time management. However, mental problems that I may encounter in my future career will not be so easy to resolve and I understand that. Humans are complex. Some psychological problems can be resolved using medication, but medication will be a last resort when it comes to how I try to help my clients in the future.
According to Romans 3:10 of the King James Bible, “. . . there is none righteous, no, not one.” If righteous means good, then that must mean that all humans are bad. This statement is also supported by the Christian belief in the fall of mankind in Genesis chapter 3 and the subsequent beliefs that because of the fall, all humans are born with a sin nature. Even Stenmark (2009) admits that “human nature [is] the range of human traits and behavior patterns that are inborn rather than learned” (p.898) in his idea of a social constructivist’s point of view. Stenmark (2009) also discusses what he calls his “free will thesis, that [. . .] human beings are created by God with a free will” (p. 910). This is the Christian (and my own personal belief) that we, as humans, were created in order to follow and serve God, but that he wanted us to serve him voluntarily. He made the angels without free will to serve him involuntarily, but that’s a discussion for another time. Having free will made the fall of human kind possible, and again, proves that we are all born with a sin nature since we are all descendants of the first two humans. My personal philosophy, rooted deeply in my beliefs, is that everyone is born with a sin nature and a free will. I feel that I have adequately explained my basic beliefs on human nature, so I feel more comfortable moving on, as most of my other responses will stem from this basic belief.
People are motivated by different things; however, I believe that the basic motivation is pleasure or satisfaction. I believe that people do the things they do for pleasure. In some cases, such as drug and/or sex addictions, the pleasure may be more temporary than the pleasure you might get from helping at a food pantry or homeless shelter. Both good and bad deeds can bring a person pleasure, and we experience pleasure then we are more likely to repeat the action. This belief can be proven through behavioral theories as tested by B. F. Skinner with his birds. The birds were getting pleasure from their reward of food and so repeated the process.
Personal problems can be caused by any number of things. I believe, however, that stress is a large factor in personal problems. Yes, problems can be tests from God, or they can just be the messes that our sinful human nature has gotten us into, which would also explain some of the large amounts of stress that we are under. I also believe that stress is large reason for problems being maintained and even worsened. When we stress and worry over something, we sometimes tend to make the problem larger than it was to begin with. One simple example is when you stress over a test or homework assignment so much that you may put off studying, but then you realize that if you don’t at least look over the notes a couple hours, that you really will fail.
These problems can be fixed easily with stress or time management. However, mental problems that I may encounter in my future career will not be so easy to resolve and I understand that. Humans are complex. Some psychological problems can be resolved using medication, but medication will be a last resort when it comes to how I try to help my clients in the future.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
I think I've really found it...
While reading my Intro to Counseling book, I realized that I was actually excited about it and really getting into it. I've never been one of the over-achieving-read-my-textbook-all-the-time kind of people, so when I realized I was into the middle of chapter 2 (I was only planning on reading a couple pages of chapter 1), I realized that this is something I really will love. It's not just a small interest. I'm really excited about all of it. You know, that feeling you get when you know you're doing what God wants? Yeah. It hit me.
I feel so stupid (I was going to say sometimes, but it's honestly most of the time) when I'm surprised about how things turn out when I follow where I believe God to be leading me. I'm still not completely positive on the "specialty" He wants me to pursue but I'm sure He'll let me know in time.
Right now I have so many thoughts flying through my head that it's hard to focus on what I really came to blog about, so I think I'll cut this one short. Just, do me a favor? Pray for me. I know most of you, if not all of you do, but it feels good to know I can ask.
I feel so stupid (I was going to say sometimes, but it's honestly most of the time) when I'm surprised about how things turn out when I follow where I believe God to be leading me. I'm still not completely positive on the "specialty" He wants me to pursue but I'm sure He'll let me know in time.
Right now I have so many thoughts flying through my head that it's hard to focus on what I really came to blog about, so I think I'll cut this one short. Just, do me a favor? Pray for me. I know most of you, if not all of you do, but it feels good to know I can ask.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Babies, classes, and babysitting
Ok. Babies. Growing up, babysitting my siblings...I always told my mom that I was never going to have kids. (Now before anyone gets too excited or nervous, I am NOT pregnant.) With that said...babies and raising them has been on my mind so much lately and it's driving me crazy. I want children. Eventually. Who am I kidding? I want one now, but then again I don't. Ugh. Having a baby right now would not be good for either me or my husband. We still have so much learning to do with each other. Not to mention the fact that we both have some growing up to do; I feel like I jumped into raising a teenager, anyway, when I got married. Ha! AND while there are many money-savers....we don't have money to raise a baby. And we haven't even figured out how to save money properly with just the two of us.
The best thing for us is to wait. I know that. I just can't seem to shake the feeling that I should be talking about how far along I am, craving strange foods, and going to the bathroom every 5 minutes. Maybe it's the fact that people used to tell me what I great mom I would be. Maybe it's the fact that the majority of my friends have either had a child within the last 2 years or are currently pregnant. I don't know what else it could be. I'm 21. My biological clock should not be ticking so loudly! I know I'm not ready to have a baby, to raise a child. I know that. I do.
Maybe school will help keep my mind occupied. *sigh* Classes started today. One of my classes has me completely overwhelmed already. I'm taking 3 classes, but there is so much work already! In my counseling theories class, my first paper is over my personal philosophy of human nature. It's due on the 29th. God is trying to tell me something with this assignment...and I have a feeling it's going to be hard road. See? Who has time for wondering about the future when I'm trying to focus on times a little closer at hand?
If you made it this far, thanks for reading my jumbled thoughts. Moms: I will work at the school from 9-2 or 3 depending on how many days a week I work. As of right now, I'm working at Domino's as well (2 - 3 nights a week)...but I'd rather babysit...seriously. If any of you might have some regular times you want to get away and leave the kids with someone...or if several of you want to pay me to watch your children for a few hours... :)
The best thing for us is to wait. I know that. I just can't seem to shake the feeling that I should be talking about how far along I am, craving strange foods, and going to the bathroom every 5 minutes. Maybe it's the fact that people used to tell me what I great mom I would be. Maybe it's the fact that the majority of my friends have either had a child within the last 2 years or are currently pregnant. I don't know what else it could be. I'm 21. My biological clock should not be ticking so loudly! I know I'm not ready to have a baby, to raise a child. I know that. I do.
Maybe school will help keep my mind occupied. *sigh* Classes started today. One of my classes has me completely overwhelmed already. I'm taking 3 classes, but there is so much work already! In my counseling theories class, my first paper is over my personal philosophy of human nature. It's due on the 29th. God is trying to tell me something with this assignment...and I have a feeling it's going to be hard road. See? Who has time for wondering about the future when I'm trying to focus on times a little closer at hand?
If you made it this far, thanks for reading my jumbled thoughts. Moms: I will work at the school from 9-2 or 3 depending on how many days a week I work. As of right now, I'm working at Domino's as well (2 - 3 nights a week)...but I'd rather babysit...seriously. If any of you might have some regular times you want to get away and leave the kids with someone...or if several of you want to pay me to watch your children for a few hours... :)
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Update and Spring Semester
Ok. Second blog. I sat down to write it the other day...and it was mostly just rambling and was more of a flow of consciousness writing than a blog. It started out just being an update on my progress, but then I kept thinking of things I wanted to say and it just spilled out onto the screen in a jumble.
Anyway, as far as the progress report: I lost 4 pounds last week! Most of it was working on portion sizes, but I did start working on my activity level as well. I walked more and started playing on the Kinect more. Actually, right now I'm extremely sore. Unfortunately, I didn't do as well with my other resolution. And just so you all know, I toyed with the idea of leaving that information out of the blog completely, but in order to uphold the accountability I've asked for, I decided it was best to be honest - even though I'm really embarrassed.
Alright, moving on now. I started my Graduate Assistantship today! I think it's going to be great this semester! The lady I'm working for is great! I think the job is going to be pretty laid back, but I might have to opportunity to go with her on some of her trips to talk to the state government in Little Rock. I bet most of y'all didn't know that I love stuff like that?! I'm still nervous about classes, but they start tomorrow and I'm sure I'll figure it out soon.
Along with classes getting started back means that MBSF is gonna start back up next week and that has me super pumped! I didn't realize how much I missed all those girls until just now. Plus, I think there are some pretty cool things planned for this semester! I know they are going to start raising money for their mission trip to Belize and that's pretty exciting! Also, I was promised that we could have a Fruit Ninja party one night! (We have Fruit Ninja on the Kinect and it is pretty awesome. lol) Besides all of that, I really do like the Bible studies that we've done ever since the Blackfords got here. In fact, I could probably go on and on about all of my friends, including the Blackfords...but I think I'll save that sappiness for another blog.
Alright, well, I have a pile of laundry, literally a pile, that needs to be folded and put away. Oh, and does anyone have any ideas on how to make smelly fabric smell better? I got some from my Granny that had been stored in a plastic box..and they smell terrible. Help?! : ) Now...off to fold that laundry.
Anyway, as far as the progress report: I lost 4 pounds last week! Most of it was working on portion sizes, but I did start working on my activity level as well. I walked more and started playing on the Kinect more. Actually, right now I'm extremely sore. Unfortunately, I didn't do as well with my other resolution. And just so you all know, I toyed with the idea of leaving that information out of the blog completely, but in order to uphold the accountability I've asked for, I decided it was best to be honest - even though I'm really embarrassed.
Alright, moving on now. I started my Graduate Assistantship today! I think it's going to be great this semester! The lady I'm working for is great! I think the job is going to be pretty laid back, but I might have to opportunity to go with her on some of her trips to talk to the state government in Little Rock. I bet most of y'all didn't know that I love stuff like that?! I'm still nervous about classes, but they start tomorrow and I'm sure I'll figure it out soon.
Along with classes getting started back means that MBSF is gonna start back up next week and that has me super pumped! I didn't realize how much I missed all those girls until just now. Plus, I think there are some pretty cool things planned for this semester! I know they are going to start raising money for their mission trip to Belize and that's pretty exciting! Also, I was promised that we could have a Fruit Ninja party one night! (We have Fruit Ninja on the Kinect and it is pretty awesome. lol) Besides all of that, I really do like the Bible studies that we've done ever since the Blackfords got here. In fact, I could probably go on and on about all of my friends, including the Blackfords...but I think I'll save that sappiness for another blog.
Alright, well, I have a pile of laundry, literally a pile, that needs to be folded and put away. Oh, and does anyone have any ideas on how to make smelly fabric smell better? I got some from my Granny that had been stored in a plastic box..and they smell terrible. Help?! : ) Now...off to fold that laundry.
Monday, January 2, 2012
New Year, New Resolutions, New Job
I've made two New Year's Resolutions. Unlike in years before, I've thought long and hard about these; they are two things that I plan on taking throughout the whole year: a) lose fifty pounds and b) read my Bible everyday.
Those of you who have known me over the span of my life know that I've gained more than the "freshman fifteen" in the past couple of years. It's gotten to the point that I can hardly stand to look in the mirror anymore. Forget getting dressed up. None of my clothes really fit and shopping depresses me even more. I'm sure every woman goes through this at one point or another, but I can't stand it. I've had people tell me they've wondered if I was pregnant and no woman wants to hear that. If I think about it too long, I end up crying and asking myself why I don't get up and do something about it. So that's what I'm doing. I have no doubt that it will be a tough and emotional road...but I know that I can do it. God wants me to take care of my body, and I don't think I've been doing such a great job of that over the past couple years. And that brings me to my second resolution -
- reading my Bible everyday. You'd think that growing up as a preacher's kid that I would know better by now and already be in this habit, but unfortunately, I'm not. My senior year of high school, Mom and Dad started their Live It. It required them to record what they ate (basically counting calories if I remember right?), how much/long they exercised, and what verses they read every day. Getting healthy and staying healthy (aka losing weight and keeping it off) are not always easy to do, and you can't do it for yourself. That was what the Live It was about, keeping your temple God-worthy. Bible study is a huge factor in keeping your spirit healthy, just like physical exercise will help keep your body healthy. I still don't know what I'll be using as a guide for this portion of my New Year's resolutions, so I might just be free-styling like I've done in the past (we see how well that's worked out), although Katherine's Resolution 365 sounds like a good idea!
I really do feel as though I'm starting a new chapter this year. I'll be starting my Master's in a couple weeks, complete with a new job and new opportunities. Because my classes will all be online and/or at night, I feel as though I'll have more freedom to exercise and study my Bible. Like my voice teacher told me my freshman year, "You may just have to set aside time every day, just like you would with any other class." I'm almost scared to ask for it, because I know several of you will make good on it, but I need some accountability. I guess that's really why I started the blog. I'll update on my progress every couple weeks, but I'm hoping to blog about other things well. In any case, I would appreciate any prayers!
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